I Tried To Love You But…

I Tried To Love You But…

 

Everyday

I tried to love you

But I couldn’t

You were to me

The wrong man

That I married

It was an arranged marriage

That made me loose the man

Of my dreams
design-60

 

 

You loved me

You were the best

You lived for me

However,

I could never forget

That you were not

My choice

I believed our marriage

Was an accident

That should never have happened

 

 

One morning in September

You woke up

And said

“You know what? I release you.”

And that was final

I was free

But an ache began

To eat me up

As I realized that

I could not live without you

I could not forget the way

You loved me

 

And I became convinced that

No man will ever

Love me

The way you did

However it was too late

Your heart had

Turned away from me

 

 

Here I am

Sad and miserable

Missing the years that

We spent together

And drowning in memories

Of our intertwined past life

That just won’t go away

 

I was such a fool

To let go of

A love so beautiful

But it is simply

Too late

 

I now know that

I loved you

I had to miss you

To realize that

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Golden Mermaid

Golden Mermaid

 

Golden mermaid

Despised and rejected

Afflicted and tortured

Buried alive

Cry no more

 

 

Golden mermaid

Idol and shrine

Perverted by men

Kidnapped and disfigured

Cry no more

 

 

Golden mermaid

Created perfect by God

Turned into a mermaid

By a human priest

Cry no more

 

Golden mermaid

Crying tears of blood

Emitting wealth, protection and prosperity

Healing the nations

Reject the evil decree and

Transform into your destiny

 

 

Golden mermaid

You are human not a mermaid

You belong to the light

That garment is a false

Garment

Put on your heavenly garment

To fulfill destiny

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Acquited

Acquited

I was acquired today,

In a controversial case.

A very public spectacle,

And real life soap opera,

Where I was charged for the murder

Of my ex husband’s lover.

I was detained, chained and humiliated.

Even my friends doubted my innocence

My own parents and siblings

Privately pleaded with me to confess

Because they knew I despised my ex husband’s lover.

They reasoned that I must have gone crazy

For a split second.

 

After a while, I almost

Gave in just to have peace

I wanted to plead guilty and just die

Or remain in prison.

 

Of course there wasn’t enough evidence to nail me,

And I was acquitted.

But I tell you,

Today is the saddest day of my life,

Because in the eyes of the world I am guilty.

There are pockets of protests across

The country asking for a retrial.

You might say that I am free,

But now, I am in the biggest cage of all.

The cage of public and media trial,

The cage of intense hatred and isolation,

Where everyone is convinced that I am guilty.

Acquitted? Yes.

Free? No.

Related Images:

I Roam The Streets

I Roam The Streets

I Roam the streets

Begging for food

I am lowly

And despised

But I was not always like this

I mingled with the wrong crowd

Who introduced me to poison

To cope with life

And the drugs took over

I am ravaged

I am helpless

I am sick

Please do not despise me

I need help

When you see me

Or another me


Help me

Or say a silent prayer

For me

Or another me

But please don’t despise me

Because I already

Hate what I have become

 

Related Images:

Thief In The Night

Thief In The Night


You crept into my heart

Like a thief

A lonely woman

Taking care of two children

Committed to Christ

And His gospel


You came in an unfamiliar way

Like a perfect brother,

Best friend and father.

You loved my children

Like your own,

You carried my emotional burdens.

 

I had lived alone

For ten years

Since the death of my husband .

Gradually, I became drawn to you,

Because you

Took away my loneliness

And became my pillar and support


However,

You were married and

Knew that as a fervent

Believer,

We would never be lovers.

You seemed fine with it

But I had unwittingly fallen

Into your trap.

 

One cold winter night

You came as usual,

To help with my sick child.

All I wanted to do was say

A quick thank you,

And it happened

We spent the night together

As lovers.


I cried all day

And all week after that,

Because I despised myself

For what I had participated in.

I subsequently blocked you

Out of my life,

And recommitted by life

To Christ and His word.

 
Thank you my Lord

For giving me strength

To overcome sin.

You are the husband of widows

And father of the fatherless.

I will wait upon you

For your own blessing.

If you bless me with a husband fine,

If you don’t,

I will not bow

To the idol

Of sin.

Related Images:

I Walked Upon The Seas

I Walked Upon The Seas


I walked upon the sea

I never could imagine

That one day

I would walk upon the sea

And live above fear and doubt

 

I walked upon the sea

When I saw your perfect love

And greatness

I became calm

And rested in you


I walked upon the sea

When the winds and waves

Of trials and affliction

Threatened to drown me

They said to me,

” We will make your life so miserable

That you will wish you were never born

Denounce Jesus

Because we will never let you

Preach the gospel.”

I shrugged and replied

” I don’t care.”


I walked upon the sea

When I was given grace

To fly above trials

And circumstances

And Trust in

Him, my savior


Lord may we

Walk upon the sea

Everyday

In quiet assurance and peace

Knowing that

You will never leave us or forsake us

Give us the strength to focus on

Your love and power

Instead of the sea of circumstances and trials

Yes, may we walk upon the seas

Everyday

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Violated 

Violated 


Forcefully

He took me

Forcefully

He violated me

With disrespect

Disregard

And cold, cruel contempt

I cried until

I slumped

On the cold concrete

Close to a church

Wanting to die

My breathing, shallow and weak

I prayed,


“Take me Lord

I don’t want to stay here anymore,

In a cold cruel world.”

Then I heard voices

But they sounded like

Angels singing

Or a church worship session

The singing was angelic

“But surely

These are humans,”

My tired mind wondered

My mind reeling and spinning

I lay there

Bleeding and in pain

“I can’t loose my baby.”

My mind shrieked,

“No I can’t loose my baby,”

I suddenly wanted to live

For the sake of my baby

An unfamiliar groan sifted into my mind

“Who is groaning?”

I thought within me

Then I heard voices

This time closer to me

“She alive,” a female voice yelled

A male voice replied,

“Call 911, she will make it in Jesus name.”

“Yes pastor,” the female voice answered

The pastor held me and rocked me like a new born baby

“Jesus loves you, you will be okay,”

One year later

The pastor married me

And my baby is our baby

Related Images:

Hello, Stranger In Black

Hello, Stranger In Black


Hello

Stranger in black,

Why are you so sad?

What happened to take away your smile?

You are young

You are pretty

What happened?

Hello

Stranger in black

I saw you at the Bank

And instantly knew

That you were special

Then I saw you on my street

And realized you just moved in

I see you often

In shops

And in Church

Give me a chance to speak to you

And make you smile again

From your heart


Hello

Stranger in black

Your sadness has frozen men away

And made you solitary

You sometimes smile

But in your eyes

Your sorrow shows
Hello

Stranger in black

Your black garment is spiritual

Not physical

You have mourned for too long

Hidden from men

Take off your black garment

And smile once again

Because this man

Speaking wants to

Transform your inner garment

From sorrow to happily married

He wants to make you a special women

If you will let him

Related Images:

The Last Time I Saw You

The Last Time I Saw You

The last time I saw you

You could not look at me

You were angry

Traumatized and sad

Because I left you

And broke our vow

 

The last time I saw you

You had become an addict

To alcohol

You were tired and discouraged

You hated women

 

The last time I saw you

I wondered if you would ever heal

And I also became sad

Because I hurt you

By leaving

And made you loose

Confidence in love and marriage


But you must remember

That we fought everyday

In front of our children

We were both miserable

And our home became

A battle ground

And a place of mourning

Unhealthy for us

And our children

Everyday I pray

For you

The father of my children

That God will heal your heart

And mine too

Because we both need it

Divorce is painful

Divorce is sad

But sometimes

It just has to happen

Related Images:

When You Said Goodbye 

When You Said Goodbye 


And that when I started to cry

When you said goodbye

When you took your love

And gave it

To someone else

 

I started to cry

When I remembered the home

We built together,

And our lovely kids

I started to cry

When you ignored your children

And pretended they

Did not exist

 

But I stopped crying

When I remembered

The goodness of God

And his mercy

He became

The father of my children

And I never lacked

He wiped away my tears

And brought David

Who loved me

And grew old with me

And I never remembered

You or your betrayal

Ever again

Related Images:

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